Get Excited About Tim Tebow Being Excited
Ugh. Yes, just like all the other media sheep, I wasted twenty minutes yesterday listening to Quarterback Jesus, aka Tim Tebow, wax moronically about his arrival in the Big Apple. In case you were smart and skipped it, I’m here to tell you it was a cacophony of platitudes oozing with sincerity and graciousness. In other words, everything I loathe about pointless sports press conferences. But it was fun to count how many times Timmy Time said “excited.” Hint, it was a bunch. I lost interest after 25, but luckily those Johnny on the spots over at BuzzFeed kept the ticker going.
Adorable, isn’t he? I hear the team has scheduled another presser for Wednesday afternoon featuring Mark Sanchez in an underground Manhattan BDSM club speaking through a ball gag about how it feels to be rammed in the ass by Jets management. Should be exciting.