Five Worst Types of NFL Fans

Patriots Fans

The NFL regular season is rapidly approaching us, which means it is time for an unnecessary countdown of some sort. Let’s start with the five worst types of NFL fans…


Two Team Guy

You can’t have two favorite teams, period. I don’t want to hear some dragged out story about why you like the Saints and the Patriots, or some other random combination of teams. You pick a single team and they are your team. You don’t get the convenience of switching back and forth depending on what team is performing better. This person always has to say “and if they ever play, I don’t know what to do”…give me a break buddy, pick a team.

Torn Fan


Uninformed Guy

This is the guy who is going to try to select Joey Galloway in the third round of your fantasy draft next week. He has no comprehension of what team each player is on, and yet still tries to interject himself into arguments about the NFL. “What do you mean the Rams won’t be good this year? They still have Issac Bruce and Torry Holt, no?”…Shut up.



The Manganelli

Unless you live in Texas or your family lived in Texas at some point, thus making your Dad a Cowboys fan, you shouldn’t be rooting for them. Don’t come at me with the “America’s Team” excuse, you obviously just remember Dallas being really good when you were wrong and decided to become a front runner. I bet you are a Lakers or Bulls fan too.



No Team Guy

A close cousin of “Two Team Guy”…pick a damn favorite team. Don’t come up with the “I just like watching the sport” nonsense and then conveniently root for who suits you to just piss off your friends you are watching the game with. This is the guy who if you are a Jets fan, wore a Colts jersey to watch Wild-Card weekend with you, then a Patriots jersey to watch Divisional weekend with you, and then finally a Steelers jersey to watch Championship Sunday.


Pretend To Be Interested Guy

A close cousin of “uninformed guy”…who acts like he is a big fan of the NFL but all of a sudden when you are sitting around watching playoff games he is on the computer, Facebook chatting his girlfriend about movies, or upstairs in the kitchen watching TBS.

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