A Gambling Manifesto: Ridiculous Super Bowl XLIV Bets

By Zach Tropf (@jericho6) on February 5th, 2010

The current line on the Super Bowl has the Indianapolis Colts favored by approximately five points or so over the New Orleans Saints. This pending the latest Dwight Freeney injury news or late public money wagers, which are prone to shift the line once again before kickoff. But barring a Peyton Manning late night hooker escapade, you know the Colts will remain a mild favorite for the game. The game is also expected to be a shootout between the two high-powered offenses, as the Over/Under is hovering around 56½ points. It’s another bet to consider if you would rather root on the final score instead of specific teams involved.

Of course, that’s not the extent of Super Bowl betting. In fact, we’ve barely scratched the surface. What about the grand world of Prop betting? It’s something made famous after William “the Refrigerator” Perry scored way back in Super Bowl XX. That’s where one can find an outlet for your serious gambling addictions. So, in that spirit, let’s examine some of the more ridiculous bets out there. Some are odd, some are truly bizarre, and most require zero knowledge of football…or anything at all. If you are a degenerate gambler, then these are for you. (A quick note for gambling novices: If the money line is negative, such as -145, then you have to wager $145 to win $100. This works for any negative number, you wager that much to win $100. If the money line is a positive number, then you will wager $100 to win the money line. For example, if the money line is +145 then you wager $100 to win $145. For straight odds, its about the numbers. If the odds are 6-5, it means you will get $6 profit for every $5 wagered. If it states 20-1, it means you get $20 profit for every $1 wagered (i.e. bet $2 and get $42 back). This works for any numbers listed):

First we have the Coin Toss (BetUS.com)
Heads: -110
Tails: -110

And also the Team to Win Coin Toss (BetUS.com)
Saints: -110
Colts: -110

At least both heads and tails are the same odds. It wouldn’t make sense otherwise. So maybe there is some logic to this whole thing after all. Let’s move on to the people in the stands…

What color top (not on jacket if separate top and jacket are shown) will Kim Kardashian be wearing at the Super Bowl? (Bodog)

Black: 10/13
White: 13/4
Any Other Color: 6/5

Will Kim Kardashian Wear a Saints Shirt or Jersey? (BetUs)
Yes: +150
No: -200

How Many Times will CBS show Tony Dungy on TV? (BetUs)
Over: 1½ TV Shots -150
Under: 1½ TV Shots +120

Will they show a replay of Tom Benson celebrating the missed field goal against Tampa Bay from the regular season? (Bodog)
Yes: +250
No: -325

And no, we have not forgot about the Manning clan, but we’ll have to come back to them. Kickoff is approaching, so how about a national anthem prop?

How Long will it take Carrie Underwood to Sing the Star Spangled Banner (from starting note to last note sung)? (BetUs)
Over: 1 minute and 41 seconds: -110
Under: 1 minute and 41 seconds: -130

I like the over on that one, but that’s just me. So the National Anthem is over, which means we get talking some nonsense. Any bets on them? Sure!

Which sideline reporter will be on TV first after the opening kick off (Both side line reporters must be in attendance for wager to have action)? (Bodog)
Solomon Wilcots: -115
Steve Tasker: -115

How Many Times will CBS announcers specifically say “Hurricane Katrina” during the game (from kick off until final whistle)? (Bodog)
Over: 2½: -150
Under 2½: +120

And if you dig hard enough, I’m sure you can bet on the mentions of inspirational stories, like references to the Haitian backgrounds of Pierre Garçon and Jonathan Vilma or references to Saints “uniting” New Orleans. But enough on that, let’s hit halftime. And if you are wondering how many halftime songs there will be that aren’t currently CSI theme songs, then this is the type of bet for you:

What song will The Who open with? (BetUs)
I Can’t Explain: -300
Who Are You: +400
My Generation: +600
Baba O’Riley: +800
Substitute: +1000
Pinball Wizard: +1000
Won’t Get Fooled Again: +1200
Behind Blue Eyes: +1500
You Better You Bet: +1800
The Kids Are Alright: +2000

Number of Pete Townshend Total Windmills? (BetUs)
Over: 5½ Total Windmills: -200
Under: 5½ Total Windmills: +150

If any member of the Who smashes their guitar what does the guitar hit first? (Bodog)
Floor: 1/5
Speaker: 4/1
Microphone: 5/1
Drummer: 200/1
Fan: 200/1

Halftime is over! And for those of you’ve that watched, you were treated to another act that was more relevant twenty years ago than today. That’s okay, I don’t listen to much music of today anyway. To this point you might notice I’ve largely skipped bets on the game. Those aren’t ridiculous enough on the whole. Except with the refs. You never know with them, and this has been a bad year overall for referees, so let’s throw this one in…

What will be the result of the first coaches challenge in the game (Wager is official once either coach challenges a play? (Bodog)
Play Overturned: -115
Play Stands: -115

Given some of the calls this year, I don’t know what’s a good bet here. So let’s hope there’s no major controversies and just fast forward to the end of the game. You know when the Gatorade showers start to commence. Which brings us to…

Color of Gatorade dumped on the Winning Head Coach? (BetUS)
Blue: +1000
Clear / Water: +150
Lime Green: +600
Orange: +500
Red:+1000
Yellow: -13

Or you can take slightly different odds at Bodog:
Lime Green: 8/1
Yellow: 10/13
Orange: 11/2
Red: 10/1
Blue: 25/2
Clear/Water: 9/5

Just a note, “clear/water” has been the winner in three of the last four Super Bowls. Might be worth a shot, even if I’m personally hoping for blue. And one last Gatorade related bet…

What side of the ball with the Players that perform the Gatorade Shower be from (Players must be holding a part or piece of the bucket to be counted towards wager. If there are players from both sides of the ball involved in the actual dumping of Gatorade then Wagers are No Action)? (Bodog)
Offensive: +140
Defensive: -170

Damn those offensive players hogging all the Gatorade glory! Okay, now the game is over. Still a few bets to cover. First, let’s start with the commercials. They’ve all aired. So who’s the winner there?

Higher Rated Super Bowl Ad on USA Today’s annual Ad Meter? (Bodog)
Anheuser-Busch / Budweiser: 20/29
Go Daddy.com: 9/1
Career Builder: 9/1
Coca-Cola: 8/1
Family First: 12/1
Doritos: 12/5
Other: 11/4

Bud’s always a good bet, but not much money to be made on that one. What about the ratings?

What will the TV Rating be?
Over 42.9 Neilsen Rating: -135
Under 42.9 Neilsen Rating: +105

These are supposed to be smaller markets, but Manning is a big name. Maybe the over is a worthwhile bet (like I really have any idea what’s a good bet here)? Whatever the correct answer is, let’s make sure not to forget about the Manning clan…

How Many Times will CBS show Archie Manning on TV during the game (live pictures only)? (Bodog)
Over 4: -180
Under 4: + 150

How Many Times will CBS show Eli Manning on TV during the game (live pictures only)? (Bodog)
Over 3: -160
Under 3: +130

Which of course brings us to the end of the game…

The last scoring play of the game will be… (Sportsbook)
Colts Defense or Special Teams TD: 14/1
Colts field goal: 5/2
Colts safety: 40/1
Colts touchdown pass: 3/2
Colts touchdown run: 3/1
Saints Defense or Special Teams TD: 14/1
Saints field goal: 3/1
Saints safety: 40/1
Saints touchdown pass: 3/2
Saints touchdown run: 4/1

Which brings us to the MVP. Not who will win. That’s not ridiculous enough. How about who he thanks?

Who will the Super Bowl MVP of the Game Thank First? (Bodog)
God: 7/5
Family: 8/1
Teammates: 1/1
Coach: 12/1
Does not Thank Anyone: 5/2

There’s a lot of bets on a Pierre winning MVP, either the Saints’ Thomas or the Colts’ Garçon. Apparently, if you knew this long ago, you would have gotten some pretty sweet odds. Even being named Pierre is reasonably rare, about 25,000 in the United States, or one out of every 125,000 people. But with around 1600 NFL players, the odds of any one guy name Pierre and being an NFL player is at something like 156 million to 1. So imagine two guys named Pierre scoring in a Super Bowl or winning MVP would be astronomical.

Well that wraps up our rundown of ridiculous Super Bowl bets. If you’ve gotten this far, here’s a table of actual spreads and over/unders of all the Super Bowls:

SUPER BOWL HISTORY

Superbowl	Year	Winner	Winner’s Line	Loser	Total	Location
XLIII	2009	Pittsburgh Steelers 27	-6.5	Arizona Cardinals 23	46.5, OVER	Tampa, FL
XLII	2008	New York Giants 17	+12	New England Patriots 14	55, UNDER	Glendale, AZ
XLI	2007	Indianapolis Colts 29	-7	Chicago Bears 17	47, UNDER	Miami, FL
XL	2006	Pittsburgh Steelers 21	-4	Seattle Seahawks 10	47, UNDER	Detroit, MI
XXXIX	2005	New England Patriots 24	-7	Philadelphia Eagles 21	46.5, UNDER	Jacksonville, FL
XXXVIII	2004	New England Patriots 32	-7	Carolina Panthers 29	37.5, OVER	Houston, TX
XXXVII	2003	Tampa Bay Buccaneers 48	+4	Oakland Raiders 21	44, OVER	San Diego, CA
XXXVI	2002	New England Patriots 20	+14	St. Louis Rams 17	53, UNDER	New Orleans, LA
XXXV	2001	Baltimore Ravens 34	-3	New York Giants 7	33, OVER	Tampa, FL
XXXIV	2000	St. Louis Rams 23	-7	Tennessee Titans 16	47.5, UNDER	Atlanta, GA
XXXIII	1999	Denver Broncos 34	-7.5	Atlanta Falcons 19	52.5, OVER	Miami, FL
XXXII	1998	Denver Broncos 31	+11	Green Bay Packers 24	49, OVER	San Diego, CA
XXXI	1997	Green Bay Packers 35	-14	New England Patriots 21	49, OVER	New Orleans, LA
XXX	1996	Dallas Cowboys 27	-13.5	Pittsburgh Steelers 17	51, UNDER	Tempe, AZ
XXIX	1995	San Francisco 49ers 49	-18.5	San Diego Chargers 26	53.5, OVER	Miami, FL
XXVIII	1994	Dallas Cowboys 30	-10.5	Buffalo Bills 13	50.5, UNDER	Atlanta, GA
XXVII	1993	Dallas Cowboys 52	-6.5	Buffalo Bills 17	44.5, OVER	Pasadena, CA
XXVI	1992	Washington Redskins 37	-7	Buffalo Bills 24	49, OVER	Minneapolis, MN
XXV	1991	New York Giants 20	+7	Buffalo Bills 19	40.5, UNDER	Tampa, FL
XXIV	1990	San Francisco 49ers 55	-12	Denver Broncos 10	48, OVER	New Orleans, LA
XXIII	1989	San Francisco 49ers 20	-7	Cincinnati Bengals 16	48, UNDER	Miami, FL
XXII	1988	Washington Redskins 42	+3	Denver Broncos 10	47, OVER	San Diego, CA
XXI	1987	New York Giants 39	-9.5	Denver Broncos 20	40, OVER	Pasadena, CA
XX	1986	Chicago Bears 46	-10	New England Patriots 10	37.5, OVER	New Orleans, LA
XIX	1985	San Francisco 49ers 38	-3.5	Miami Dolphins 16	53.5, OVER	Stanford, CA
XVIII	1984	LA Raiders 38	+3	Washington Redskins 9	48, UNDER	Tampa, FL
XVII	1983	Washington Redskins 27	+3	Miami Dolphins 17	36.5, OVER	Pasadena, CA
XVI	1982	San Francisco 49ers 26	-1	Cincinnati Bengals 21	48, UNDER	Pontiac, MI
XV	1981	Oakland Raiders 27	+3	Philadelphia Eagles 10	37.5, UNDER	New Orleans, LA
XIV	1980	Pittsburgh Steelers 31	-10.5	Los Angeles Rams 19	36, OVER	Pasadena, CA
XIII	1979	Pittsburgh Steelers 35	-3.5	Dallas Cowboys 31	37, OVER	Miami, FL
XII	1978	Dallas Cowboys 27	-6	Denver Broncos 10	39, UNDER	New Orleans, LA
XI	1977	Oakland Raiders 32	-4	Minnesota Vikings 14	38, OVER	Pasadena, CA
X	1976	Pittsburgh Steelers 21	-7	Dallas Cowboys 17	36, OVER	Miami, FL
IX	1975	Pittsburgh Steelers 16	-3	Minnesota Vikings 6	33, UNDER	New Orleans, LA
VIII	1974	Miami Dolphins 24	-6.5	Minnesota Vikings 7	33, UNDER	Houston, TX
VII	1973	Miami Dolphins 14	-1	Washington Redskins 7	33, UNDER	Los Angeles, CA
VI	1972	Dallas Cowboys 24	-6	Miami Dolphins 3	34, UNDER	New Orleans, LA
V	1971	Baltimore Colts 16	-2.5	Dallas Cowboys 13	36, UNDER	Miami, FL
IV	1970	Kansas City Chiefs 23	+12	Minnesota Vikings 7	39, UNDER	New Orleans, LA
III	1969	New York Jets 16	+18	Baltimore Colts 7	40, UNDER	Miami, FL
II	1968	Green Bay Packers 33	-13.5	Oakland Raiders 14	43, OVER	Miami, FL
I	1967	Green Bay Packers 35	-14	Kansas City Chiefs 10	NL	Los Angeles, CA